Your weekly collection of marketing tips, hints, and advice interspersed with humor, inspiration, and other goodies to spice things up a bit. Guidance, tutoring, advice, mentoring, coaching, inspiration, English lessons, editing, proofreading services for entrepreneurs and online marketers.
The publisher’s philosophy is that most learn faster by taking small bites, rather than large gulps. Small bites are chewed more thoroughly, swallowed, and digested more readily. Keeping that in mind, many features will be solo items. That way, you will not be bombarded or overwhelmed.
Publisher: Mary Wilkey
Volume 2 - Issue 26XX - September 28, 2002
Regular issue published every Tuesday evening
Hi, everyone! I've just gotta ask—what do you think of our new classified ad program? Acceptable? Confusing? Object to it? Suggestions? Any feedback is always helpful.
In case you missed the announcement, very briefly, you now can get a PRIORITIZED classified ad for just a dollar. What that does is to jump your ad to or near the TOP of the queue, ahead of the totally free ones, instead of being delayed because of the huge number of ads in the queue. To get a PRIORITIZED classified, scroll to the ETCETERA section below and click on the PayPal button.
That said, whatever you do, if you want a belly laugh today, don't miss Today's Chuckle. I had tears in my eyes after reading it! Enjoy!
We would like to welcome all our new subscribers from
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To have your ad
placed in this ezine, click on the link above.
If you enjoy this ezine, you can help it grow faster by introducing 'elf Expressions to just one other person—because the faster we grow, the more everyone benefits from the ads. Thank you!
If you've missed any issues, you still can see them.
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"We all experience 'soul moments' in life—when we
see a magnificent sunrise, hear the call of the loon,
see the wrinkles in our mother's hands, or smell the
sweetness of a baby. During these moments, our bodies,
as well as our brains, resonate as we experience the glory of being a human being."—Marion Woodman
CONTENTS:
Sponsor Ad
Guest Article
Today’s Chuckle
Internet Tips & Hints
Guest Article
Inspiration
Etcetera
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REFINED CARBOHYDRATES: THE NUMBER 2 DIETARY PROBLEM
As promised, I've temporarily suspended publishing personal testimonies in this slot to include a few excerpts from the amazing book that started it all, "Lessons From the Miracle Doctors," by Jon Barron.
This includes all refined and processed foods, including:
Everything made with white flour
White rice
Cold cereals
Most hot cereals
Most snack foods
All sugar foods, including cakes, candies, and soda pop
They negatively affect the body in a number of ways. They are all acid forming in the body, which we'll talk more about in Chapter 13. They are all converted to triglycerides in the body and stored as fat. And they all rank high on the glycemic index (with no redeeming nutritional value such as the fruits and vegetables that are also high on the glycemic index.)
If you would like to get a free download of Jon Barron's book, "Lessons from the Miracle Doctors," go to:
If you would like to look into becoming a distributor, just go to this website:
Watch the 6-minute video presentation (it may take a few minutes to load). Fill out and submit the questionnaire at the end of the presentation. Very shortly then, you will be contacted to determine if you qualify for our program.
GUEST ARTICLE
THE INTERNET . . . A WRITER'S PARADISE
by John Colanzi
I shake my head and wonder why more marketers aren't
writing. The internet has made it possible for everyone
to spill their thoughts onto the screen.
It doesn't take a genius or tons of talent. It just
takes patience and persistence.
When I started writing, I was the worst writer who
ever lived. I still can't believe I was crazy enough
to send out some of those early articles.
If it wasn't for the freedom of the net, I would have
been dead in the water. No editor would have ever
published my ghastly ramblings.
Luckily, it was my ezine and I could practice and learn.
With only 300 subscribers, I had nothing to lose.
Eventually, I started becoming readable. Not very good,
just readable.
My good friend, the internet, let me keep plodding along.
Now, after tons of practice and learning, I can consider
myself a writer. I can't even conceive of doing anything
else.
The internet has literally changed my life.
I've gone from the 95% trying to make a dollar online
to working when I feel like it. Truthfully, I can't
even call it work.
I get paid to have fun.
If I can do it, so can you. Let your articles be your
training ground.
Over time you'll start your own viral marketing machine.
Some of the long term benefits to you and your business
are:
* Instant branding
* More online friends than you can shake a stick at
* Tons of sites linking to you
* More joint venture offers than you could ever accept.
That's just the tip of the iceberg.
The internet is a writer's paradise, and if you're not
taking advantage of it, shame on you.
Do yourself and your business a favor and start writing.
You'll not only help yourself, you may just help others
along the way.
Noise proves nothing. Often a hen who has laid an egg
cackles as if she had laid an asteroid.
—Mark Twain
A BIBLE RIDDLE
In His kingdom, Jesus gave us freedom from sin. Once we are set free from sin, what are we now servants (slaves) to?
ANSWER: Righteousness, as found in Romans 6:18: "Being then made free from sin, ye became the servants of righteousness."
Realize that change is not always a process of improvement. Sometimes it's a process of invention. When Thomas Edison invented the lightbulb, he didn't start by trying to improve the candle. He decided that he wanted better light and went from there.
—Wendy Kopp
TODAY'S CHUCKLE
NOW HERE'S WHAT GOT ME TO LAUGHING SO HARD . . .
Stupid people should have to wear signs that just say, "I'm Stupid." That way you wouldn't rely on them, would you? You wouldn't ask them anything. It would be like, "Excuse me . . . oops . . . never mind—didn't see your sign."
It's like before my wife and I moved. Our house was full of boxes, and there was a U-Haul truck in our driveway. My neighbor comes over and says, "Hey, you moving?" "Nope. We just pack our stuff up once or twice a week to see how many boxes it takes. Here's your sign."
A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of mine. We pulled his boat up to the dock, I lifted up this big ol' stringer of bass, and this idiot on the dock goes, "Hey, y'all catch all them fish?" "Nope. Talked 'em into giving up. Here's your sign."
I was watching one of those animal shows on the Discovery Channel. There was a guy inventing a shark bite suit. And there's only one way to test it. "All right, Jimmy, you've got that shark suit on, it looks good . . . They want you to jump into this pool of sharks, and you tell us if it hurts when they bite you." "Well, all right, but hold my sign. I don't wanna lose it."
Last time I had a flat tire, I pulled my truck into one of those side-of-the-road gas stations. The attendant walks out, looks at my truck, looks at me, and I SWEAR he said, "Tire go flat?" I couldn't resist. I said, "Nope. I was driving around and those other three just swelled right up on me. Here's your sign."
We were trying to sell our car about a year ago. A guy came over to the house and drove the car around for about 45 minutes. We get back to the house, he gets out of the car, reaches down and grabs the exhaust pipe, then says, "Darn, that's hot!" See, if he'd been wearing his sign, I could have stopped him.
I learned to drive an 18-wheeler in my days of adventure. Wouldn't you know, I misjudged the height of a bridge. The truck got stuck and I couldn't get it out, no matter how I tried. I radioed in for help, and eventually a local cop shows up to take the report. He went through his basic questioning . . . okay . . . no problem. I thought for sure he was clear of needing a sign . . . until he asked, "So, is your truck stuck?" I couldn't help myself! I looked at him, looked back at the rig and then back to him and said, "No, I'm delivering a bridge . . . here's your sign."
I stayed late at work one night and a co-worker looked at me and said, "Are you still here?" I replied, "No. I left about 10 minutes ago. Here's your sign."
Anybody you know need a sign today? The next time someone says something stupid, ask him where his sign is.
Have a great day . . . "Here's your sign!" Hahahahahahahahahaha
The mind is the limit. As long as the mind can envision the fact that you can do something, you can do it—as long as you really believe 100 percent.
—Arnold Schwarzenegger
When you're down to nothing, God is up to something.
INTERNET HINTS & TIPS
CUSTOMIZE A SECOND WINDOW
This cool script allows you to open a second window,
which you can customize according to your preferences.
If you don't have the Bread of Life, you're toast!
GUEST ARTICLE
12 TIPS TO WORK MORE EFFECTIVELY AT YOUR DESK
(excerpt from Chapter 6 of THE PROCRASTINATOR'S HANDBOOK)
by Rita Emmett
1—Write down your ideas. Do not trust your memory, however
good it may be!
2—Set down your priorities before the start of each day's
work.
3—Use your high productivity hours for your top priority
projects.
4—Tackle time-consuming projects in stages.
5—Do not over schedule. Leave some time each day free from
appointments.
6—Concentrate on one item at a time.
7—Take breaks. Walk around. Stretch. Eat lunch away from
your desk.
8—Establish a place for everything. Categorize, file, and
store items nearby.
9—Keep paperwork moving.
10—Put limits on visits:
a) Stack stuff on any extra chairs so uninvited visitors have
to stand.
b) When chatty people call, as soon as you answer the phone
tell them you have only a few minutes to talk. Politely ask
them the point of their call right away.
11—Remove from your desk all papers you are not working on.
This prevents lost or mixed up papers.
12—Handle each piece of paper only once.
***************************************
Rita Emmett, author of The Procrastinator's Handbook, is a
professional speaker who presents Keynotes and Seminars
nationwide. She has helped thousands of people blast away
procrastination. For more information, she can be reached
at 847-699-9950. Her website is RitaEmmett.com and email
is Rita@RitaEmmett.com.
INSPIRATION
OPENING PRAYER — KANSAS STATE SENATE
Thought you might enjoy this interesting
prayer given in Kansas at the opening session of their Senate. It seems prayer still upsets some
people. When minister Joe Wright was asked to
open the new session of the Kansas Senate, everyone was expecting the usual generalities, but this is
what they heard:
Heavenly Father, we come before you today
to ask your forgiveness
and to seek your direction and guidance. We know
Your Word says, "Woe to
those who call evil good," but that is exactly
what we have done. We have
lost our spiritual equilibrium and reversed our
values. We confess that:
We
have ridiculed the absolute truth of Your Word
and called it pluralism.
We have exploited the poor and called it
the lottery.
We have rewarded laziness and called it
welfare.
We have killed our unborn and called it
choice.
We have shot abortionists and called it
justifiable.
We have neglected to discipline our
children and called it building self-esteem.
We have abused power and called it
politics.
We have coveted our neighbor's
possessions and called it ambition.
We have polluted the air with profanity
and pornography and called it freedom of speech.
We have ridiculed the time-honored values
of our forefathers and called it enlightenment.
Search us, oh, God, and know our hearts
today; cleanse
us from every sin and set us free. Guide and bless
these men and
women who have been sent to direct us to the
center of your will
and to openly ask these things in the name of
your Son,
the living Savior, Jesus Christ.
Amen.
The response was immediate. A number of
legislators walked out
during the prayer in protest. In six short weeks,
Central Christian Church,
where Reverend Wright is pastor, logged more than
5,000 phone calls, with
only 47 of those calls responding negatively.
The church is now receiving international
requests for copies of
this prayer from India, Africa, and Korea.
Commentator Paul Harvey aired this prayer
on his radio program,
"The Rest of the Story," and received a larger
response to this program
than for any other he has ever aired.
With the Lord's help, may this prayer
sweep over our nation and
wholeheartedly become our desire so that we again
can be called ". . . one
nation under God . . ."
If possible, please pass this prayer on
to your friends.
Think about this: If you forward this
prayer to everyone on your
email list, in less than 30 days it would
be heard by the world.
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