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'elf Expressions Ezine
Get Hold of Your Elf!

"Get hold of your 'elf!"

Your weekly collection of positive tips, hints, and advice offered with humor, inspiration, and other goodies for anyone and everyone who is inclined to read. Guidance, mentoring, inspiration, English lessons, editing, proofreading services for entrepreneurs and online marketers.

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Publisher: Mary Wilkey
Volume 6 - Issue 4 - January 31, 2006
Published every Tuesday

Good afternoon, everyone . . .

There's a little something for everyone in this issue — lots of good health tips — a brief commentary on the state of humanity in the U.S. today — a little humor — a good article on email marketing — another article on starting off the New Year productively and successfully — a slightly different twist to our Memories section — and some encouragement to print out and tack up where you will see it all day.

Remember, feedback is what I live for! :-)

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In Remembrance of
September 11, 2001

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If you enjoy this ezine, you can help it grow faster by introducing 'elf Expressions to just one other person—because the faster we grow, the more everyone benefits from the ads. Thank you!

If you've missed any issues, you still can see them. Just go to:
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Happy is he who has the God of Jacob for his help, whose hope is in the Lord his God.
—Psalm 146:5

Contents:
Sponsor Ad
Ad Contest
A Healthier You
Feature Article
Test Your Bible Knowledge
Classifieds
Today’s Chuckle
Today's English Lesson
Internet Tips & Hints
Guest Article
Memories
Inspiration
Etcetera

Sponsor Ad

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Ad Contest

Results of our last ad contest, when the question was: What is the world's greediest animal? The answer — The larva of the polyphemus moth (Antheraea polyphemus) of North America consumes an amount equal to 86,000 times its own birthweight in the first 56 days of its life. In human terms, this would be equivalent to a 3.17 kg (7 lb) baby eating 273 tons of food. See William Petersen's ad above.

For our subscribers only: Be first to submit the correct answer to the following question and receive the next available top sponsor ad free. So answer this:
What is the world's largest concrete dam?

Send to contest@elfexpressionsezine.com and be sure to include your ad with your entry so that I do not have to contact you separately to get it. Several people have missed out having their ads published, because they did not respond with their ads in before my deadline.

A Bit o' Useful Info For You!

Cell phone companies are charging us $1.00 or more for 411 information calls when they don't have to.
When you need to use the 411 information option, simply dial 1-800-FREE-411 (1-800-373-3411) without incurring a charge at all, except for the minutes required to make the call. Works on home phones also.

A Healthier You

What follows are some miscellaneous health tips I have gleaned from hither and yon. Hope you can benefit from them.

For all those with macular degeneration, never ever take aspirin! Why? It causes bleeding behind the eyes, can cause a detached retina, and aggravates M.D.!
***********************************************************************************************
C.L.A. (Conjugated Linoleic Acid) burns fat and melts cellulite. Find it at health food stores.
***********************************************************************************************
Talc (as in talcum powder and baby powder and most bath powders) causes ovarian cancer! Note — Many people are under the erroneous impression that what they put on their skin is okay, as long as they don't ingest it. Wrong! The skin is our largest organ and absorbs anything it comes in contact with. Go ahead and prove it to yourself. Rub a freshly cut clove of garlic on the bottom of your foot. You will taste it in half an hour!
***********************************************************************************************
Chlorine and fluoride in water prevent the right levels of iodine from getting to the thyroid and cause thyroid malfunction, just one of the many consequences of drinking such treated water. While chlorine is necessary to kill disease-causing bacteria in the water, fluoride is not. It does not prevent tooth decay, but causes it—and it is toxic waste from the aluminum industry, not natural fluoride!
When water gets to your home, you need to filter it with a really good system to remove the chlorine. This was brought home to our military most dramatically during the Vietnam War (I believe it was), when our troops were given chlorine tablets to protect them from the only water available to them. Those young men came home with atherosclerosis (hardening of the arteries), a condition normally found only in the elderly!
***********************************************************************************************
Pork contains methionine, which converts to homocysteine (the real cause of some heart attacks, not cholesterol) . . . if you take folic acid, Vitamins B6 and B12, homocysteine is then converted back into methionine. Note — You never should take isolated "B" vitamins, unless you also take the full spectrum of "B," (a good B-complex formula). Why? Because isolated "B" vitamins cause an imbalance in the other "B" vitamins not being taken.
***********************************************************************************************
Do not go on a high-protein diet (read Atkins or anything similar)—it will destroy your kidneys!
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The top 5 acid producers:
           1 — Tylenol (acetophenimen)
           2 — Caffeine
           3 — Soda pop
           4 — White flour (Rats won't even touch it!)
           5 — White sugar (which causes cancer)

An acidic pH in your body breeds disease. Disease cannot thrive in a body that is slightly alkaline.

Feature Article

The State of Humanity in the U.S.

One of our residents came to me recently on behalf of her ninteen-year-old son, who had shown up the night before quite unexpectedly.
She had not seen him for six months. He had hiked for about ten miles and had waited for hours for her to return from work.
He was unemployed, had only the clothes on his back, was penniless and desperate. He has a history of grand mal seizures, ADD, ADHD, and God-only-knows what else.
His mother had lost custody of him when he was only three. He's been in and out of various foster homes and group homes. He's been in trouble and served jail time. He's smoked for years, has been into alcohol and drugs, etc.
We rent individual rooms by the week. This woman rents one of them. We allow no visitors in the rooms for many reasons. The boy needed a room of his own.
She made a tearful plea on his behalf; surprisingly, he is well mannered with a "regular" haircut, no piercings or tattooes, and appeared to be clean. They were applying for community assistance, and so we extended him a room on faith.
He had been to a hospital emergency ward the day before and was given several prescriptions . . . for what, I have no clue.
But both mother and son seemed to have an ample supply of cigarettes. It always puzzles me to see this, when you know that smokes are three dollars a pack and up. No matter what, it seems they always have money to burn!
What really appalls me is that this young fellow is not an exception, but representative of the present state of this generation!
The description above could be applied to thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of young people today. I feel so very sorry for them. They truly are a lost generation.
Most of them have had little or no training in the basics of life. They have few morals or values of any kind. They are practically devoid of self esteem. Most of them are dropouts. Most have no goals, and most never read a book.
Most rarely, if ever, give any consideration to their spiritual development. Most will claim to believe in God, but hardly any have a clue as to what God or why, nor do they care.
Sadly, some have several children out there someplace. (What on earth will their kids be like?) The sporadic child support they pay is mostly a legal obligation, not a moral one. They have no hope for the future and live only for the present. Many of them care for no one and nothing. Most all of them are from broken homes and fractured families.

Both mother and son left the premises on a sour note, after having damaged the property and stolen various items. Neither would own up to any of it.
Kinda makes you wonder where this country is going to end up, doesn't it?

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You may reprint the above article with this info intact:
Article penned by Mary Wilkey, publisher of 'elf Expressions Ezine:
http://elfexpressionsezine.com
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Test Your Bible Knowledge

Where would you find: "Choose you this day whom ye will serve"?
Answer — Joshua 24:15

Classifieds

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Do You Have . . . or know of . . .
a Luxury Home for Sale?

I work with a private investment trust that is interested in acquiring luxury homes, at least 3,500 square feet, minimum value $1.5 million, located on five acres or less.
To qualify, it must be in an area of similarly priced homes, not sitting out by itself. Ideally, the house should be vacant. Also, no middle men. The trust will work directly with only the property owner.
They can normally close with cash in 60 days if the price is right, as they are seeking only homes that can be bought below market. After agreeing on a price, they can send a contract in 24 hours.
If you have something that fits those parameters, email me so that we can get started on any properties that you may have in mind. And there is a generous finder's fee for you! (limited to U.S. properties only)

Sincerely,
Mary W.
blessed@direcway.com

"My parents didn't want to move to Florida,
but they turned sixty, and that's the law."
—Jerry Seinfeld

Today's Chuckle

They Say it All, Don't They?

A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!"
His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means?"
The son replied, "I do know!"
"Okay," said his father. "So, son, what does the Bible mean?"
"That's easy, Daddy. It stands for 'Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.'"

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say,
"I think I'll squeeze these dangly things
here, and drink whatever comes out?"

Today's English Lesson

Seeing the same elementary mistakes over and over again has prompted this publisher to write an English lesson each issue. Look for some of these lessons to be repeated, because the mistakes are!

Just when I think I've run out of fodder for this feature:
(Spotted in another ezine): "They had better adhear to the rules"! I am not kidding! Nor am I kidding about this one: "He was not wearing an earpeace"!
These two sad examples have to be a reflection of our deteriorating "public educational" system, don't you agree?

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Reminder: We offer a reasonably priced editing/proofreading service for articles or even entire ezines. Just email: service@elfexpressionsezine.com

Be realistic . . . plan for a miracle!

Internet Hints & Tips

5 Email Marketing Lessons You Can Benefit From
by Debbie LaChusa

When I first started my small business marketing consulting business in 1998, I knew cultivating relationships was key to growing my business and getting new clients.
I knew I would need a way to stay in touch with the people I met at networking events, as well as my past clients, friends, and business colleagues in order to facilitate referrals.
So I started sending out a monthly text email called "Tips & Trends."
It consisted of a brief "hello" message and a link to a page on my web site with information on a current marketing trend I'd read about and some helpful marketing tips.
This whole process was pretty crude. I managed it out of Microsoft Outlook, and my goal was never to build a big list, but rather to stay in touch with people I already knew.
And you know what? It worked.

Read the particulars at:
http://www.niche-articles.com/res/email-marketing-lessons/

"Knowledge comes, but wisdom lingers."
—Alfred Lord Tennyson

Guest Article

5 Tips to Create Positive Changes in Your Life
by Christopher Green

As we settle into the New Year, millions of good intentions and ambitions to make this a better year have already been abandoned. It’s an annual triumph for fear, as it knows that the hope and exuberance of New Year celebrations will subside, and things will carry on in pretty much the same way.
Fear of change is the main obstacle to overcome here, and millions of people are so frightened of it they avoid change like the plague. Below are five ways to create life-enhancing growth, so 2006 will be the year you changed your life for the better.
1 — Decide firmly to embrace change. If you decide to wrap yourself up in a cocoon to hide from change, you will never achieve any of your dreams. Change is the only way to grow. Break free from the cocoon, and open yourself up to the new possibilities change will bring.
2 — Now you’re ready to decide exactly how you want your life to be. Spend at least one hour a day thinking about the changes you want to bring about in your life, and commit your ideas to paper. Give it serious thought so that you can work out in detail what you truly want to do with your life. Know this: within your mind is where the seeds of change are sown. Everything you want to do has to first come from thought.
3 — Once you’ve decided on your wants, set goals. It is absolutely vital that you commit your thoughts to paper in the form of goals. Goals are the building blocks of dreams, and you will achieve your dream one block at a time. A great idea is to set the final objectives, and then work backwards to establish each required action.
4 — Time for action. It is at this point where fear rears its ugly head and spoils the dreams of millions. Do not listen to your fears. Muster your courage, and have the determination to take action. A great way to do this is to spend just one hour a day working on your first goal. Get used to bringing about small changes, and you'll develop the confidence and ability to effect greater and greater change.
5 — Recognize that your fear will try to stop you from creating change at every possible moment. Make a firm resolution here and now to not let it stop you. Fear exists only in one place—your mind. Make 2006 the year you conquer fear, and create the life you truly desire. People who achieve their dreams all have one thing in common: they felt fear, but they had the courage and determination to conquer it. You can do it, too.
This year can carry on like previous ones, or it can truly be your year. You have the power to choose how it will be. Use your power.

©2006, Christopher Green
===========================================================

Chris Green is the author of the new book "Conquering Fear," a special program which will show you how to conquer fear and attract greater happiness, success and prosperity into your life. To get your free e-course, please go to => http://www.conqueringfear.net

Memories

Do You Remember?

Just in case you weren't feeling too old today, this will certainly take care of that.
The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born in 1988!
They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up.
Cloth diapers never touched their pampered little behinds.
Their lifetime has always included AIDS.
Bottle caps have always been plastic and screw off.
The CD was introduced two years before they were born.
They have always had an answering machine.
They have always had cable.
They cannot fathom not having a remote control.
Jay Leno has always been on the Tonight Show.
Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.
They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.
They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.
They don't know who Mork was or where he was from.
They never heard: "Where's the Beef?" or "I'd walk a mile for a Camel," or "de plane, Boss, de plane."
They do not care who shot J.R. and have no idea who J.R. even is.
McDonald's never came in Styrofoam containers.
They don't have a clue how to use a typewriter, and most have never seen one.
Do you feel old yet? Be sure to copy and send this along to all the other old fogies on your list.

Inspiration

You Can't . . . He Can!

I can't . . . God can!
Why? God knows.
When? As soon as I get the doubts out and trust Him.
How? That's His problem, not yours.
Why me? Why not you . . . you are a child of God, are you not? And He chastises those He loves, just as your natural daddy did.
If only . . . Not your problem.
But . . . Not your problem.
I knew it . . . You get what you expect!
I can't believe that . . . The grass is green, whether you believe it or not.
I'm afraid . . . Why? Jesus is in the boat with you.
I'm worried . . . Why? Jesus is in the boat with you.
But what if . . . Not your problem.
But I need it now . . . It's yours, as soon as you get the doubts out and trust, fully and completely.
But I don't understand . . . God does!
I don't see how . . . God sees . . . He has 20/20!
Nothing's happening . . . that you can see, but God sees!
Things just keep getting worse . . . Things are not as they appear to you. You cannot see the big picture!
I prayed for ________, but it didn't happen . . . why? God knows! Maybe the timing is wrong . . . everything happens in His timing, not yours!
If you are discouraged, print off the above, and tack it up where you will see it during the day.

Etcetera

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blessed@direcway.com

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