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'elf Expressions Ezine

Get Hold of Your Elf!

"Get hold of your 'elf!"


Your weekly collection of positive tips, hints, and advice offered with humor, inspiration, and other goodies for anyone who is inclined to read. Guidance, mentoring, inspiration, English lessons, editing, proofreading services for entrepreneurs and online marketers.

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Publisher: Mary Wilkey
Volume 8 — Issue 26 — July 8, 2008
Published every Tuesday


Welcome to this edition, and as a follow-up to last week's feature article, in which I told you about our visit to the Big Shaggy Buffalo Ranch, I just want you to know that we tried the buffalo liver a few days ago, and it was just as yummy as the burgers . . . cooked quickly, and also contained less gristle than beef or calf liver. I'll be fixing buffalo stew this week and will let you know how that turns out, as well.

Meanwhile, I hope you enjoy this issue.


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In Remembrance of
September 11, 2001

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Smile!

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Signature


 

If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.

—2 Chronicles 7:14


Contents:

Top Sponsor
Weekly Contest
Subscriber in the Spotlight
A Healthier You
Feature Article
Test Your Bible Knowledge
Today's Chuckle
Today's English Lesson
Internet Tips & Hints
Political
Guest Article
Inspiration
Etcetera


Contest


Results of last issue's contest, when the question was — What is the most valuable Mickey Mouse toy?

The answer — The most valuable Mickey Mouse toy is a rare clockwork Mickey Mouse motorcycle (circa 1939) in its original box. It sold at Christie's, London in June 1997 for $83,650. Mickey Mouse could well be regarded as the most recognizable cartoon character in the world. This particular toy was bought in a British Woolworth's store, as a ninth birthday present for the seller's uncle in June 1930.

Taking into account that the famous cartoon rodent first appeared in April 1928, the toy is considered one of the earliest examples of a Mickey Mouse in existence. Made of lithographed and colored tin plate, it represents "ratty" Mickey—the early form of the cartoon character, who had a longer nose and leaner body than he does today. No one entered last issue, so no one won!

For our subscribers only: Be first to submit the correct answer to the following question and receive the next available top sponsor slot gratis. So answer this:

What is the biggest book of signatures in the world?

Send to contest@elfexpressionsezine.com and be sure to include your promo copy with your entry, so that I do not have to contact you separately to get it. Several people have missed out having their copy published, because they did not respond before my deadline.


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Develop a passion for learning.
If you do, you will never cease to grow.

—Anthony J. D'Angelo, The College Blue Book



A Healthier You


You may be wondering how in the world you're going to add/subtract all this stuff we've been talking about. Well, stop wondering. You don't have to do it all. That's why I'm giving you so much, so that you can pick and choose, because no one will do them all.

So today it's time to subtract, and you're probably going to be surprised at this one: Don't read the newspaper, and don't watch the news!

Why? Because all that negative stuff will affect your body's pH (the acid/alkaline balance). It needlessly causes you worry and stress, and we already have enough of that in our lives without someone feeding more of it into our minds. Much of it is biased anyway, and in some cases, untrue!

And watching the news just before going to bed is one of the worst things you can do. You simply don't need it!

The Bible is right, in that we should fill our minds with whatever is wholesome, good, true, and noble.

Now, don't write and tell me that I'm being an ostrich. Reading a couple of headlines on the Internet a day will give you all the news you need to know . . . but do it in the afternoon while there is still enough of your day left so as not to interfere with your sleep.





There are three ingredients to the good life:
learning, earning, and yearning.

—Christopher Morley



Feature Article


Why do People Make the Bible More Complicated Than It Is?

There are entire sects out there that claim that Christians are no longer under "the law," meaning the rules of the Old Testament (including the Ten Commandments), and there are other sects that claim that that is totally untrue.

Well, which is it?

My Bible tells me (as I covered in a recent Bible study at http://tinyurl.com/2medqa), that all the law is fulfilled in the keeping of the two New Testament commandments, i.e., "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength, and you shall love your neighbor as yourself."

The reason for that should be obvious, but if it is not obvious to you, there is one question that you need to answer. If you are keeping the two commandments of the New Testament, how could you be breaking any of the original ten commandments of the Old Testament?

Answer: It just would not be possible. Case closed!

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Test Your Bible Knowledge

Fill in the following ". . . and they drew and lifted up Joseph out of the pit, and sold Joseph to the __________ for ______ pieces of silver . . ."

1 — Canaanites, 40
2 — Ishmeelites, 20
3 — Egyptians, 20
4 — Israelites, 77

Scroll down for the answer.





Who you are speaks so loudly I
can't hear what you're saying.

—Ralph Waldo Emerson



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"Giving money and power to government is like
giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys."

—P. J. O'Rourke



Today's Chuckle


Teacher Applicant

After being interviewed by the school administration, the eager teaching prospect said:

"Let me see if I've got this right. You want me to go into that room with all those kids, and fill their every waking moment with a love for learning, and I'm supposed to instill a sense of pride in their ethnicity, modify their disruptive behavior, observe them for signs of abuse and even censor their T-shirt messages and dress habits.

You want me to wage a war on drugs and sexually transmitted diseases, check their backpacks for weapons of mass destruction, and raise their self esteem. You want me to teach them patriotism, good citizenship, sportsmanship, fair play, how to register to vote, how to balance a checkbook, and how to apply for a job.

I am to check their heads for lice, maintain a safe environment, recognize signs of anti-social behavior, make sure all students pass the state exams, even those who don't come to school regularly or complete any of their assignments.

Plus, I am to make sure that all of the students with handicaps get an equal education regardless of the extent of their mental or physical handicap. I am to communicate regularly with the parents by letter, telephone, newsletter and report card.

All of this I am to do with just a piece of chalk, a computer, a few books, a bulletin board, a big smile and on a starting salary that qualifies my family for food stamps! You want me to do all of this and then you tell me . . . I can't pray?!"





"The magician and the politician have much in common: they both have to draw our attention
away from what they are really doing."

—Ben Okri



Today's English Lesson


Seeing the same elementary mistakes over and over again has prompted this publisher to write an English lesson each issue. Look for some of these lessons to be repeated, because the mistakes are!

Today, let's learn the difference between "ad" and "add"!

I know, I know—it's hard to believe that anyone publishing online wouldn't know the difference, but . . . I actually saw this elementary error in a recent issue that shall remain nameless.

"Ad" is short for "advertisement." Period. "Ad" also can indicate a Latin prefix or suffix, but that is another issue and one we'll not discuss here.

"Add" refers to appending something, whether it be a number or a quantity, etc.

Please note: The two words are not interchangeable!

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Reminder: We have a reasonably priced editing/proofreading service for articles or even entire ezines. Just email: service@elfexpressionsezine.com





We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but
by learning to see a imperfect person perfectly.

—Anonymous



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Internet Hints & Tips


Internet Marketing Strategies
by Simon Longhurst

The right strategies to win a share of the Internet pie. Every move in life needs a sound strategy to succeed. Now that you are keen on making some serious money on the Internet, what you need is the right strategy to help you attain your goals.

Although the Internet has opened a whole new world of opportunity for even the smallest residence-based business owner, it takes the right start and a perfect execution to make it work. Countless numbers of self-made millionaires started their Internet businesses from the ground up, found a niche, and built their success a day at a time.

You need not be an Internet guru to really make it big on the net. What you need is a little passion, a decent amount of effort, and lot of strategic thinking to succeed. A solid Internet marketing plan will include everything from your ad to your thank you and follow-up letters. Each process in your plan must perform a specific task.

Read the rest of Simon's excellent article at http://tinyurl.com/6d4pqo



Political


Obama's 143 Days of Senate Experience

Just how much Senate experience does Barack Obama have in terms of actual work days? Not much.

From the time Barack Obama was sworn in as a United States Senator, to the time he announced he was forming a Presidential exploratory committee, he logged 143 days of experience in the Senate. That's how many days the Senate was actually in session and working.

The one single Senate committee that he headed, never even met—not even once.

After 143 days of work experience, Obama believed he was ready to be Commander-in-Chief, leader of the free world, and fill the shoes of Abraham Lincoln, F.D.R., and Ronald Reagan.

Think about it: 143 days, which means 20.4 weeks or more plainly, 4.7 months.

Our children and grandchildren spent more time in pre-school getting ready for kindergarten!





"People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of thought which they seldom use."

—Soren Kierkegaard



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Guest Article



How Do You Live the Internet Dream?
Automate, Automate, Automate!
by Diane Hughes

There's no doubt that one of the things that excited you about operating your online business was the thought of making money while you're in bed. Having free time to spend with your family while—at the same time—generating an income is something almost every person on earth wants. But as you've moved further and further into the Internet business realm, you've most likely discovered that this is hard work!

Are all those so-called marketing gurus lying? Do they really generate enough money to live on when only working 10 to 20 hours per week? And what's more . . . can you?!

Some may be lying, but I'm living proof that you can have it all. What's the secret? Automation!

Automate what? Everything you possibly can. Why automate? Because the less time you actually have to spend at your business the more time you can spend doing the things you love. Also, the more "hands-off" your business is the more profitable it becomes.

Most of the people who have made it big online have their own products that they deliver electronically. However, if you sell affiliate products, physical products, or even services, there are an unlimited number of ways to automate your daily routine.

Let's take a few moments to review some ways you can find to automate as much as possible about your business so you can be free to enjoy your life.

Action Step 1
Make a list of those routine chores you do every day. (Answer email, check search engine positioning, review pay-per-click ads, calculate payments, etc.) Everything!

Action Step 2
Next, place a checkmark beside each item on your list that is repetitive. These are items where your actions are exactly the same (or practically the same) each time you do the action.

These are the items in your routine that can most likely be automated.

Action Step 3
Visit some of the free (or cheap) software and script sites to see which ones offer helpful products you can use to automate your day. You can find free software at http://www.download.com. For free java scripts, check out http://javascript.internet.com/. You can also search your favorite search engine for free C.G.I. scripts, D.H.T.M.L. scripts, and more.

Action Step 4
Read your user's manuals. I know . . . what a horrible thought! Most of the software user's manuals now are included on your hard drive. You can actually search the table of contents for topics of interest. You'll find tons of ways to automate workflow in your user's manuals.

For instance, did you know you could automatically create a table of contents (T.O.C.) using Word? If you've finished writing an ebook or report and need to add a T.O.C., Word can scan your document—no matter how long it is—and layout the TOC for you. There are also tons of macros you can set up that will automate your workflow. And Word is not the only program that does these neat tricks. You'd be surprised at what you can learn by snooping around in your user's manuals.

The more you're able to take your hands off your business, the more time you'll have to enjoy your life. You'll find your schedule is freer and your profitability is stronger. It may take some time to initially set everything up so that it works the way you need it to, but just a few short-term sacrifices can make for some pretty powerful long-term gains.

©2005, Diane Hughes

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Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive, well preserved body. But rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, Diet Coke in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming "Woo-Hoo, what a ride!"



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Answer to Bible trivia:

2 — Ishmeelites, 20 is correct.
See Genesis 37:28



Inspiration


If You Want . . .

If you want to be interesting, be interested.
If you want to be heard, listen.
If you wish to truly learn, teach.
If you would like to be wealthy, be generous.
If you desire to be understood, take the time to understand.
If you want to have many friends, be friendly.
If you long for peace, be peaceful.

If you want the world to change for the better, make a positive change in yourself.

What you give to life is what life becomes for you.

The treasures you accumulate all come from the good things you do.

Every day is your opportunity to raise your life to a higher level by giving the best that you have.

Whatever it is you desire, give it. Be supportive, and you will enjoy it in great abundance.

—Ralph Marston




Etcetera

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